Desires

After spending the last ten years or so studying psychology and behavior, I've come to the opinion that MOST of our desires, drives, preferences, strengths, weaknesses, behaviors, and personality traits are determined by our DNA and some by our social conditioning. I'm talking about both men and women here.

Even differences like whether a person prefers adventure or couch riding are largely a matter of programming from birth (If you really disagree with me on this one, read some books on the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator or try the book Who Am I? by Steven Reiss.)

In any event, HOWEVER they got to be interested in these common things, most women have a few main interests, needs, desires, or whatever you want to call them when it comes to men, relationships, and romance.

Have you ever read the personals? Have you ever noticed how many women say things like "princess looking for prince", "friends first", and "looking for my soulmate"? Have you ever noticed how almost NO men ever say these things?

What's going on?

Have you ever listened to a group of women talking about men? Ever notice how they speak largely in some kind of code language and constantly make a big deal out of tiny details that seem totally irrelevant? Have you ever noticed, on the other hand, how men are direct with each other and have no interest in bickering over small things?

What's going on?

Have you ever noticed how many women are attracted to drama? Here's my take on this whole subject: Women are playing out a role that hasn't changed for thousands (or millions?) of years. These days the language and clothing are different. But it's the same that it's always been.

There are many parts of human brains that create drives and desires for different things. Often, these drives conflict with each other. For instance, a woman might want a strong man in her life, but she might also want a feeling of independence. She might want to have attention, but she might also want to be seen as above needing it. (Men have these types of conflicts as well, but in different areas.)

So, for example, I hear a lot of men saying things like, "I hate all the drama that women create. Why do they create this stuff?" My answer: Drama accomplishes a lot of things at once. It gets attention, it sends emotions through the body (emotions are highly addictive chemicals), it's a way to be self-righteous, it's often fun, it's interesting and prevents boredom, it gives things meaning... and on and on. There are a lot of good reasons for drama. But most men can't understand because drama fulfills needs that MOST MEN DON'T HAVE.

It's like women saying, "I hate it when all a guy can talk about is sports." What needs to sports fulfill for men? Competition, adrenaline, power, domination... all the typical guy stuff. Incidentally, stuff that fulfills needs that most women just plain don't have.

Suppose that new pickup truck seems to be just what you need to feel wonderful again? Maybe it is the redecorating of the dining room. Or, perhaps it's that new Fall outfit, or the vacation that will let you get away for awhile. For some of us it might mean going off the wagon and having a drink, for others it could be eating your way through the holidays. And what if it is that clandestine affair with Mr. or Ms. Unavailable, with whom you find that your heart and hands have a mind of their own?

We all have dreams about what we would like to have in our lives. Be it a better car, a better home, or a career that inspires you to get up in the morning; all of these can seem like just an impossible dream. But, that does not mean that it HAS to be that way. You can get around the belief that it cannot happen, and start to condition yourself to EXPECT it to happen.

Manifesting can be a tricky thing to do, especially when you are not used to consciously creating the opportunities that you want. But, you can learn how and you can make your life turn around very quickly, when you keep a mind clear of distraction and disbelief and focus on bring in what you DO want.

Here are 3 tips to clear your mind and manifest what you DREAM about:

1. You want to channel your anger, frustration, and any other negative emotions and turn them into POSITIVE ones.

We all know on some level that the more negative that we feel and think about things, the worst our lives can get. Basically, you start to ATTRACT what you feel and what you consistently think about. If you want to turn things around, turn those emotions around and your results will soon begin to follow.

2. You need to zone out the nay sayers and the negative influences.

Any time that you turn on the television, the radio, or pick up a newspaper, you are going to be greeted with negative stories. It sells, and because of this, they are going to keep pounding it in your mind. Well, all that is going to do is to make everything seem a lot worse than it has to be. And that is going to make it a LOT harder to manifest your desires, when you feel the despair. I am not trying to influence you to ignore these things altogether, just tone them down a little and see the difference.

3. Find out a proper and REALISTIC method for using the Law of Attraction.

I will be the first to admit, that there is a lot of unproven hype that sometimes finds itself attached to the law of attraction. Methods that promise miracles for doing nothing will only keep you DREAMING, when you need to be MANIFESTING. With the right system, you can use the law of attraction and start seeing REAL RESULTS.